WE DESERVE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON DUDES CRAWLING OUT OF THE WOODWORK

I feel like there should be some kinda statute of limitations for time elapsed between last interaction and 2 AM "hey what's up" texts???? Like I last responded to you a year ago? Can I live?? List App Survey: What's the weirdest/most "are u serious?" instance of this kind of text that you've received? How many years/months later? I'm v curious
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    I think mine is like 3 years: junior year of college some dude I went to high school with FB chatted me at 4 AM one night asking if I wanted to go out over break and speculating that I would be good at giving BJs.....like ????????
    are u kidding me rn
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    If it's not obvious I just got one of these texts from a guy I haven't talked to since last March. Yo dude just go to sleep or something ?
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    Roughly 2 years after the dude I was only kind of dating slept with my best friend, he DM's me on Instagram (literally the only time anyone has ever done this) with a winsome "hey" ...
    Suggested by Β  @tawny
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    2 years after breaking up with me, I still get texts about her finding romantic artifacts.......OKAY AND??
    Suggested by Β  @foodnetwork
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    A guy I dated a couple months freshman yr of college that I ended it with cuz he's βŒπŸ˜ΆπŸ‘€ crazy.... Still calls me every couple of months drunk asking me to "come see him". He's married and has a kid... No thank you sir
    Suggested by Β  @smurf
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    Sophomore or junior year of college this guy from high school texts me and says that he had the hugest crush on me in highschool....and that he still does 😳
    Like what? It's been 2+years and how do you know if I'm even the same as I was in high school (I wasn't AT ALL). ??????
    Suggested by Β  @brittmaag
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    I live in a teeny tiny university town, an excellent setting in which to experiment w your sexuality!!! you get to see the dudes you tried something w and were like, "mm nope nevermind" everyday!
    one such sweetheart drunk calls me on the reg - if and only if I have just seen him at the bar and he has failed to acknowledge me. hello sir this passive/aggressive approach is not working, it has been a year and I still do not want to sleep w you!!
    Suggested by Β  @arthritis
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    February: I text "hey, I'm close by. Wanna get coffee?"
    September: "hey! What's new?" OHHHH, NO YOU DID NOT!!!
    Suggested by Β  @weimsworld
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    My ex's mom contacted me (not sure if on his behalf or not) three FULL years after we broke up to send me a picture of his nephew and let me know my ex now had his own health insurance πŸ˜’πŸ˜πŸ˜‘
    Suggested by Β  @nantea