THINGS MY DOG HAS CONSUMED
I have a dachshund that is now 11 years old. His name is Eddie. He's a special one, mostly because the little sausage eats just about anything and has somehow lived.
- •This is Eddie, my baby.
- •This little sausage has eaten:
- •Chocolate frosting off of 24 cupcakesMy mom had just made cupcakes for my brother's kindergarten graduation and left them on the stove. My dog, as curious as he is, found a way to jump on the chair, to the trash can, to the counter top and all the way to the stove where he devoured all cupcakes 1 hour before my mom had to have them delivered
- •An entire chicken wingEddie was notorious for quickly snatching food out of people's hands while they weren't looking. This time he had snatched an entire KFC chicken wing and ran away with it. When we caught up with him not 5 seconds later, there was nothing left. No bones, no skin, no evidence. He had devoured the entire thing
- •Tennis ball skinEddie loves to play fetch, but more often than none he likes fetch so much that he rips his tennis balls apart. He'll shred the entire ball and eat the outer skin. All that's left is a sad, naked tennis ball.
- •The fur off of my stuffed monkeyMy parents bought me a stuffed monkey from the zoo and I loved that thing dearly. One day I came in my room to Eddie, sitting on my bed, ripping at my monkey. When I pulled the stuffed animal away, I realized all of the long, loose fur was gone. Eddie had de-furred my monkey.
- •My eraser familiesI did this weird thing when I was young where I would cut off tops of erasers and draw faces on them and create families. One day while I was playing with them, Eddie stormed in and ate my favorite yellow eraser, Junior. I found Junior a couple days later; his little smiley face sticking out of Eddie's poop.
- •6 full "World Famous" chocolate barsMy brother was selling them for his Little League Team and my dog somehow got into the box and ate 6 of the whole chocolate bars.
- •Advil and BenadrylWe just came back from a camping trip and left an open duffel bag on the floor. Eddie got into it and ate the Advil and Benadryl inside. That was the first time we thought he might actually die.
- •ToothpasteEddie likes a to steal whole tubes of toothpaste and eat the crap out of it! At least he has minty fresh breath!
- •ChapsticksHe had an obsession with my Dad's Carmex Chapsticks for a while.