CRAZIEST THINGS ABOUT MY ARTS HIGH SCHOOL
I went to an arts high school in San Francisco. I know zero science but I can write a mean metaphor!
- •We had a huge, immaculately manicured football field even though we had no sports teams.Kids would use it to smoke weed and do the occasional under-the-bleachers rendezvous.
- •My math teacher had pink highlights and was a Burning Man devotee. She would always use the number 420 in every word problem.Is it even called a word problem? I haven't taken a math course since her class sophomore year.
- •I had a big crush on an Irish Catholic white guy in my creative writing class who frequently incorporated the word 'barrio' into his poetry slams.
- •The stoners were the cool kids.
- •Our Creative Writing teacher hired a Botu instructor who had us crawl all over the football field during class and moo like cows.
- •At one of our creative writing readings, the principal's daughter read a poem about having sex on a bicycle when she was 15.What I want to know is how you do that. She didn't go into the logistical details which is something I would have appreciated.
- •When I started dating the 'barrio' slam poet, we spent a lot of time at his best friend's house. He would have a Red Stripe and his friend's mom would offer us acid, shrooms, and homegrown weed.It was rude to say no. I spent a lot of time pretending to know how to use a bong. To this day bongs give me anxiety. What happens with the thumb? When do you take it off the hole? Ah!
- •A man in a poncho briefly taught our community service class. He had the boys apologize to the girls for being boys and oppressing us.
- •Our college guidance counselor was 70-something and desperately wanted to retire and move to the mountains, but he told me 'they' wouldn't let him.
- •Our creative writing teacher once trimmed a student's armpit hair in class.