THE ALMOND MILK THEORY

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  1. Okay so I was talking to an undisclosed friend of mine
    Who is gay
  2. About milk.
  3. And I asked what their favorite type of milk was,
  4. And they said almond milk.
  5. To which I replied,
  6. Almond milk is gay.
  7. It just came to me in the moment. It just felt right.
  8. We've surveyed twenty people. It always checks out.
  9. People who love almond milk are gay at least 90% of the time.
  10. And those who don't are straight at least 85% of the time.
  11. I don't make the rules.