THE ALMOND MILK THEORY
- •Okay so I was talking to an undisclosed friend of mineWho is gay
- •About milk.
- •And I asked what their favorite type of milk was,
- •And they said almond milk.
- •To which I replied,
- •Almond milk is gay.
- •It just came to me in the moment. It just felt right.
- •We've surveyed twenty people. It always checks out.
- •People who love almond milk are gay at least 90% of the time.
- •And those who don't are straight at least 85% of the time.
- •I don't make the rules.