I work at a grocery store and make my courtesy clerks suffer through these daily.
  1. Why do melons have to have big weddings? They cantaloupe.
  2. What does a nosy pepper do? It gets jalapeno business.
  3. *after someone buys steaks and you lift them up* Uh oh, looks like the steaks have been raised.
  4. Why did the the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
  5. A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "you know you have a roll of paper towels on your head?" The pirate replies, "yar, there be a bounty on me head."
  6. The worst and last. What do you call a sheep that's a successful nut mogul? A cash-ewe