MILESTONES IN THE LIFE OF A CONSISTENTLY LATE ADOPTER
I'm in no rush.
- •Brushing my hairIt turns out, brushing my hair feels nice and (obvi) prevents terrible, horrible nests from forming the back of my head. I still don't do it that much. Why did G-d grace me with these elegant piano fingers if not to serve as my sole hair combing tool?
- •Watching scary moviesI watched two in the past year without crying or screaming hardly at all.
- •Paying cashiers/ordering food/asking for directions (read: talking to strangers)Fixed when @MarthaQ intuitively invented exposure therapy as an 11 year old by refusing to talk to anyone on my behalf whenever we were out together sans parents.
- •Internet datingI came late to the party, but I immediately decided to "win this shit" by "power dating." Outcomes inconsistent, but I've for sure learned some cool and ugly truths about myself and strangers.
- •Putting on eyelinerI might've figured this out three weeks ago. I might be fooling myself.