BEST ADVICE I’VE EVER RECEIVED

Thank you so much to everyone over the years who have given advice, mostly unlooked for and unneeded. Here are a selection of the best pieces I've ever received.
  1. Never trust a Sicilian when death is on the line.
  2. Trust a Sicilian when death is on the line.
  3. Always wear a helmet.
  4. There is a whale on the ceiling.
  5. Wear a blazer that can double as a chalkboard eraser.
  6. Always land jumps from great heights with legs locked.
  7. Don't ever, for ever reason, do anything, to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been, ever, for any reason whatsoever.
  8. Dance like people are watching really, really disappointedly.
  9. The floor is lava.
  10. Yorkshire pudding.
  11. Lamp.
  12. My momma always said when it's right it's right.
  13. People are strange.
  14. Blessed are the poor.