Men I've Wanted to Be

Inspired by @JessePearson. Non-chronological. Mostly about power, it turns out.
  1. John Cazale
    This is the kind of actor I always wanted to be. I'd trade it all.
  2. William Randolph Hearst
    The first time I stepped into Hearst castle I thought, "Someday this all will be mine." Rapacious material desire.
  3. Indiana Jones
    I want a great hat and a big whip and a doctorate degree. I want to read hieroglyphs and solve mysteries and find treasure. Fuck you, snakes.
  4. Brian Patchett
    The coolest senior when I was a freshman in high school. He drew comics and made movies and acted and sang and danced, and was kind despite the cornucopia of his talent.
  5. JD Salinger
    I covet the ability, but I might covet the enigma even more.
  6. Jude Law circa Talented Mr. Ripley, before the hairline went
    But what would it feel like to be so pretty and a boy? Is there any greater power?
  7. Bernini, Carravagio, Van Gogh
    Much much much more than I want a penis, I would like to have hands that can do what their hands could do. Sorry Sigmund!!!! ✌️
  8. John Lennon
    I wanted to kiss Paul but I wanted to be John. Because I have TASTE.
  9. Freddie Mercury
    Like I said, I have TASTE.
  10. RFK
    This is the good part of my personality. Also, when I was 14, I saw a picture of him on top of a mountain looking hot and white and liberal, and I felt a deep desire to tap into that power.
  11. The Jeph Loeb/Tim Sale Bruce Wayne
    Just fucking cool
  12. John Steinbeck
    Better than Batman